The Sledgehammer – Version 2.0

February 13, 2008

I Guess That’s One Way to Generate Excitement About Your Products…

Filed under: Random Stuff, shopping — Tags: , , , — Brian Lutz @ 10:17 pm

When you have a company with more than 33 years of experience in the housewares industry, there’s a good chance that you’re doing something right.  Functional products such as the ones that the InterDesign corporation specializes in provide quick, low-cost solutions to everyday problems, and for that reason, there will always be a demand for such things.  In spite of this, there’s no getting around the fact that such items are by their very definition generic and rather unexciting.  So what do you do to differentiate your product on a shelf that might be filled with virtually identical competing products?

Why not try using gratuitous punctuation?  After all, doesn’t it sound a lot more exciting if you’re buying products for the kitchen! rather than just a plain old kitchen?  But the kitchen!(TM) is just the start.  After the jump, see what else in your house InterDesign is trying to make sound a lot more exciting than it probably is.

Forget the expensive fine art paintings and the fancy mirrors, these two items might be the most exciting things you can put on the walls of that soulless Suburban house of yours.   If you just buy a whole crate full of the things and stick them all over every wall in the house, it’ll be just like a nonstop party in every room!  And you’ll probably end up spending a whole lot less money than you would for one of those Picasso or Renoir paintings all the rich kids seem to have too.

When you’re designing a new product, it seems that everyone expects you to include installation instructions these days, but why bother with those?  After all, 95% of the people who buy the things are just going to toss ’em out with the packaging anyway.   If you just shout the installation procedure at them on the front of the package, that way they’ll have a lot harder time claiming that they weren’t told what to do when they call the customer service line after putting a fist-sized hole in the drywall while trying to install the thing.

That’s right,folks!  This product sucks, and we want the whole world to know about it!

Finally, we have this over tank tissue holder, which might be the most exciting thing you’ll ever hang off the side of your toilet tank.  No really, this time I mean it.  After all, what else…  Of COURSE we know about those bowl cleaner things that turn the toilet water blue, but can one of those keep two rolls of toilet paper handy when you need it most?  Didn’t think so.

There are a number of other examples of products on the shelf which employ the same inexplicable hyperbole to make mundane housewares sound a lot more exciting than they are (or ever will be,) but you’ll have to head to your nearest bed and bath store to find those ones.  I’m sure that months of careful planning and research went into the package design for these items, but clearly someone has made the decision to base an entire corporate image off of sticking gratuitous punctuation at the end of every product name.  I have two theories as to what happened here:

 a) The CEO came back from spending a weekend at an Tony Robbins seminar and decided that this was how they would make people excited about their products or

b) The guy who designs the packaging for these things forgot to take his Ritalin the day he made all these.

Anyone else got any ideas what’s going on here?

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1 Comment »

  1. Oh man this is hilarious. I keep imagining an overexcited William Shatner repeating these phrases over and over again.

    My theory: William Shatner works in marketing at InterDesign.

    Comment by mooiness — February 13, 2008 @ 11:07 pm


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