The Sledgehammer – Version 2.0

January 29, 2009

A Clean Desk is the Sign of a Sick Mind.

Filed under: Personal Stuff — Tags: , — Brian Lutz @ 5:05 pm

Anyone who knows me is most likely well aware that I’m not exactly what you’d call a neat and tidy person.  In fact, most of the time I am far from being neat and tidy.  For some time now, my apartment’s cleanliness level has been hovering somewhere in the thin range that falls between “cluttered” and “messy”.   If there’s someone around to tell me that the place is a mess and that I need to clean stuff, I’ll actually clean stuff up (sometimes,) but with nobody else living here and with visitors to my place being rather infrequent, the stuff does tend to get ignored every once in a while, until I finally get stick of looking at it.

In particular, my den/office (actually a second bedroom, but since I have the place to myself its my office) has been particularly messy, mostly due to the shockingly large pile of miscellaneous crud which usually covers up most of the desk.  For various reasons, I have managed to put off actually doing anything about the mess for far longer than I really should have, but today I finally reached the point where I got sick of looking (and having to walk around) the mess for long enough to actually do something about it.

Although there’s pretty much nobody to blame but myself for the whole place becoming so dang messy in the first place, if for some reason I was to assign blame (theoretically, of course) for why it took so long to actually clean it I’d probably have to go with this shredder, which could barely make it through the six sheets of paper it claims to be able to handle in the first place, clogged up with paper debris every few minutes requiring frequent excursions into finger-mangling territory (with the cord unplugged, of course) to clear it out enough to keep using it, and then eventually it just decided to bite the proverbial dust about halfway through the big pile of pay stubs, credit card offers and other such documents I had accumulated on my last attempt to clean this place up.  Given the fact that this was far from the first cheap document shredder that I have gone through around here, I decided that it was time to stop messing around, and get something that would actually do the job it was intended to do.  A trip to Costco and ninety-nine bucks later, I came back with Shredzilla:

Well OK, it’s not much bigger than what I had before, and it’s not intended for more than medium duty use, but compared to the dinky little thing I was trying to use previously this thing is a beast.  The remainder of the (rather substantial) document pile was dispatched in five minutes flat (it’s a lot easier to do when you don’t have to remove everything from the envelopes and feed it in three sheets at a time) and once that was out of the way, the whole thing became a whole lot less daunting.  This morning, I got the stuff cleared off the desk, cleared off far more dust from the desk than I care to admit, and after a bit of rearranging I have the desk looking pretty good, and with a whole heck of a lot more room than I would have with half a ton of miscellaneous junk sitting on top of it.  There’s just one little problem left to deal with…

Now what the heck am I supposed to with all the stuff that came off the desk?  I’ve gone through and done an initial sorting of the contents to clear out the stuff which is obviously trash, but most of what’s left here seems to be too useless to keep around but too useful to throw away.  I suppose I could meticulously sort through it all, winnow tbe pile down to the truly useful items and then store them in a n easily accessible place, but since I don’t have the attention span for that I think I’ll just toss all the stuff into a storage bin and hide it somewhere out of sight and out of mind.  There’s still plenty of cleaning to do here (and that’s not even taking the rest of the apartment into consideration,) but at least I can actually see the desk again for now.  Oh, and if you happen to be wondering about that ugly black-and-blue thing in the corner…

Long story.  I think I’ll save it for another post though…


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