Once again Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and once again, you probably have to do something about this. Depending on your relationship status, you might find yourself needing to either pursue a relationship or maintain one. Depending on the circumstances, you could be under a fair amount of pressure to produce something that will either knock his or her socks off (possibly among other articles of clothing, depending on the situation) or something that’ll just simply not mess things up.
As Pat Benetar once sung, Love is a battlefield. And these are the weapons you do not want to be wielding if you know what’s best for you. Every year since 2008 I have been doing one of these Valentine’s Day Kitsch Roundup posts, and every year the stores reliably produce a questionable array of seasonal merchandise that will land even the most hopeless romantic on the couch for their Valentine’s night. Of course, everyone’s tastes are different, and it;’s entirely possible that you might even have someone who would appreciate some of these, but in general, a lot of these things are a bad idea no matter who you’re dealing with.
Previous Valentine’s Day Kitsch Roundups:
- 2014: How do Fools Fall in Love?
- 2013: Love Conquers All (Except Bad Taste)
- 2012: If you Love Them, Leave it on the Shelf
- 2011: Love Isn’t as Blind as You Think
- 2010: All’s Fair in Love and Merchandising
- 2009: More Great Ways to Spend Your Valentine’s Night Sleeping on the Couch
- 2008: The Original Valentine’s Day Kitsch Roundup
You’ll find this year’s selection of questionable Valentine’s Day merchandise after the jump.